Priests who are married to a fellow priest encounter both ups and downs. At least that’s what the three diocesan couples who spoke with the Central Florida Episcopalian say about the unique rewards and challenges of their dually ordained status.

The Brusts visited the Cotswolds for their 30th wedding anniversary. Photo: Courtesy Brust family

For The Rev. Canon Ellis Brust, rector at St. Andrew’s, Ft. Pierce, and The Rev. Cynthia Brust, rector at Hope, Melbourne, serving in different churches is a new experience.

“Until my call to Hope,” Rev. Cynthia says, “I served my entire ordained ministry as associate rector alongside Ellis at Church of the Apostles in Kansas City, Kansas.”

The two are now both rectors of very active parishes, which does present some challenges. “Our first Christmas apart was strange, not just because of COVID, but not being together for the Christmas Eve service,” Rev. Canon Ellis says.

But being part of a two-priest family is an amazing gift for them both. “Having someone who knows me better than anyone else and knows well the joys, challenges, ebb and flow of ministry life is the best part of being married to a priest,” Rev. Canon Ellis says.

“I am so very grateful for the example of Ellis’ leadership and the opportunity to grow with him,” Cynthia says.  “Life with him prepared me as much as—perhaps more than—seminary did.”

Technically, The Revs. Amy and Brian Turner were both clergy members when they got married—as deacons. Six months later, they were ordained to the priesthood together.

Rev. Amy and Fr. Brian Turner and their four-legged fur baby, P.J. Photo: Courtesy Church of the Blessed Redeemer, Palm Bay

Rev. Brian is the vicar of Church of the Blessed Redeemer in Palm Bay. Rev. Amy is a non-stipendiary assisting priest, helping her husband with preaching and leading worship as her schedule allows. “Often, she is supplying at Episcopal and Lutheran churches in the area and is not at Blessed Redeemer for Sunday worship,” explains Rev. Brian. In addition to her work as a supply priest, Rev. Amy teaches at Pineapple Cove Classical Academy.

The Turners face the same challenges as most other two-career couples. “One juggling act is finding two positions near each other that fit each individual’s gifts and talents,” Rev. Brian says. “We don’t share a true day off together since mine are Mondays, and she is at school.”

“Since I teach during the week, my weeks are busy, and weekends can be hard to get enough sabbath time depending on if I am preaching on Sunday,” Rev. Amy says.

For the Turners, being married to another priest has several upsides.

“Having somebody to bounce off sermon ideas and discuss theology with and having someone with similar training and understanding is the best part about being married to another priest,” Rev. Brian says.

“For me, one of the best parts is our ability to understand the common challenges,” Rev. Amy adds. “Particularly when I was serving as a hospital chaplain, I could come home and process with someone who understood what it was like to help patients and families as they navigated health crises and emergencies.”

The Easterdays have served at Holy Trinity, Melbourne, since 2006. Photo: Courtesy Holy Trinity, Melbourne

The Revs. Pam and Steve Easterday, co-rectors of Holy Trinity, Melbourne, have spent only one year in separate parishes. “We attended seminary at the same time and did an intern year together in Nigeria,” Rev. Pam explains. “After ordination, we were co-vicars of a cluster of churches in Idaho for five years.”

The one year they didn’t serve together, Rev. Pam was canon to the ordinary, and Rev. Steve continued to serve two small congregations in Idaho. They served for eight years as co-deans of Gethsemane Cathedral in Fargo, North Dakota.

Over the years, they have had to do some juggling to accommodate the lives of two busy priests. “Years ago, the biggest juggling act had to do with keeping our schedules straight,” The Rev. Pam says. “Back then, we used pocket calendars and always wrote in pencil, so it was easy to change. Now we use a Google calendar on our smartphones and always know each other’s schedules.”

The Easterdays say togetherness is the best part of being married to another priest. “We love spending time together, and we love working together,” Rev. Steve says. “It is such a blessing to be married to someone who truly understands one’s work stresses.”