A Dilemma of Love and Trust, Part 2

In part 1 of this topic, we discussed a dilemma presented by a particular collect as well as a passage of scripture, John 14:15-16. Both of these somehow leave us with the following dilemma: 

“Oh God, you have prepared for those who love you such good things as surpass our understanding. But if I don’t feel like I love you, that means I’m out of the equation, right? If I can’t get what I need to be able to love, that means I am orphaned. I’m orphaned by the God of the universe. And that leaves me in a terrible spot.”

But both scripture and the collect give us the answer. Our Lord tells us, “I will not leave you orphaned” (John 14:18a). Or as the collect says, “Pour into our hearts such love toward you.” 

In other words, the collect admits the fact that while Jesus draws those who love him near to him, he also draws to him those who cannot love. And the kind of anger, disappointment and sense of betrayal that feeds the “I cannot love” is in fact no barrier to him who knew betrayal, to him who was bereft, who as the beloved Son of God, even on the cross, crying out, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matt. 27:46b) means that Jesus is no stranger to betrayal, to feeling orphaned. 

Power Greater Than the Past

And we must note that Jesus is saying these words to His disciples, prior to betrayal, crucifixion, resurrection. He knows that the very people to whom he’s speaking, the very people to whom he is offering these promises of extraordinary loving care are going to be the very people who, in a very brief amount of time, will be the ones who will betray him. He is speaking to people he knows will betray him, giving them promises that right now they cannot receive, and they will need to know that once they have betrayed him, they are not utterly lost. 

Because you see, if we have been betrayed, it almost sets us up emotionally to be a betrayer, even against all of our best instincts. We don’t want to be like those who betrayed us, but the DNA has been set. And we need God to come in and intervene and break the chain, where the sins of the fathers, whomever they might be, are passed down to the sons even to the third and fourth generation. 

You see, if I have been betrayed, because I now have the DNA within me to also be a betrayer, I need Jesus to break that cycle. I need him to come and with his powerful, powerful, compassionate, strong love, to stand between me and any whom I would desire to betray, even for the best of reasons: “He or she’s just getting what they deserve.” So I need to hear in the tenderest and yet most resolute way possible those powerful words: “I will not leave you orphaned.” 

Love Stronger Than Betrayal

And out of that grand resolution to not ever abandon us, out of that power that is stronger even then death, it is that one who can speak to me in a way that I can actually hear, “Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest” (Matt. 11:28).  Because once he claims me, he will never let me go.

The promise of not being orphaned does not free us from the experience of occasionally feeling orphaned. That’s what it’s like to live in this world where we’re knocked about, where things don’t work out the way we expect. And often the things that we have hoped for even in prayer are not temporarily answered. 

And so I need to know that there is a God, who having experienced the worst that humanity has to offer, can break into those worst places in me and stand with resolute power and great love, even with a twinkle in his eye in the midst of my agony, and extend with his nail-scarred hand, all that I need to receive, reaching for me rather than waiting for me to step up and come to him, particularly when I can’t. 

“I will not leave you orphaned.” There’s great hope in that passage. It’s the hope that invites us into a place of genuine and sublime love. That is secure and stronger than even the deepest places of betrayal. Bigger than my anger at things not working out. Stronger than the deepest depths of disappointment. A love, as the scripture says, that’s even stronger than death. 

And so hear that word from him who speaks it: “I will not leave you orphaned,” and allow that to be an invitation, where you say yes to the nail scarred hand reaching out to you, to bring you again, into a place of rest.

How has God shown you his love when you felt you could not love him? Share this blog and your response on Twitter. Please include my username, @revgregbrewer. 

(This post is an adaption of Bishop Brewer’s sermon on May 17, 2020, in the chapel of the Diocese of Central Florida in Orlando.) 

Unless otherwise noted, Scripture quotations are from the New Revised Standard Version Bible, copyright © 1989 the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.