A Dilemma of Love and Trust, Part 1

A particular collect points out a dilemma I want to discuss. Allow me to share it with you:

“O God, you have prepared for those who love you such good things as surpass our understanding. Pour into our hearts such love toward you, that we, loving you in all things and above all things, may obtain your promises which exceed all that we can desire; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God for ever and ever. Amen.” 

‘Come to Me’/ Why Would I Want To?

This collect presents both a problem and a solution, and it parallels the problem and solution given in John 14: “If you love me, you will keep my commandments. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, to be with you forever” (John 14:15-16).

The problem the collect and this passage present is that in some ways, they both give us the idea that first, I must love Jesus. And if I love him, then I’ll be able to receive. 

That is a dilemma. I don’t know about you, but there are times when I have a great sense of the love of God, and it is easy to be able to thank him, to love him and to express genuine gratitude for all that he is and all that he has poured into my life. 

But there are other times where I don’t feel any of that. And therefore, if loving him is the requirement to be able to receive, on those days when I don’t feel loved, I actually feel bereft. Particularly when the circumstances in my life get so difficult, that even when I hear the invitation, “Come to me all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens,” (Matt. 11:28a), I, if my honest heart speaks, say, “Yes, I am weary and heavy laden. And if truth be told, I’m not particularly happy about it. And so why would I want to come to you, Jesus, if you are the Lord over all these things and all this terrible stuff is going on in my life? If I come to you, am I just going to get more of the same? 

“If that’s the case, I don’t even know that I even want to come to you. I don’t even know that I have the energy to come to you. I have a right to what I feel, right? And what I feel right now is, I don’t know that I want to come.”

Sadly, for many people, they assume that last sentence, “I have a right to what I feel, right?” In essence ends the conversation. As if somehow the Savior of the world has no answering to the feelings of being bereft, or, to use the phrase Scripture uses, what it means to feel orphaned. 

‘I Will Not Leave You Orphaned’/ Why Should I Trust You?

Jesus says, “I will not leave you orphaned” (John 14:18a). And to say that is an admission that, in fact, he knows there are spaces and places in our lives where we feel entirely orphaned. 

An orphan is someone who has no one who will come and comfort them. An orphan is someone who, even if he or she has lots of relationships, does not have that kind of special familial relationship of trust that allows the orphaned to receive the love that he or she knows will come from those who have that kind of particular relationship.

And it’s compounded by the fact that there are plenty of people in our society and culture who should have received that kind of unconditional love from parents or siblings or others. And yet instead, their home life was for them a place not of comfort, but of betrayal. And so they’re even set up inside, in some ways, to be betrayed by and disappointed by authorities. They expect it because that’s been their experience, all of which gets superimposed on the invitation of Jesus: “Come to me, all you who are weary and heavy laden,” because in their heart of hearts, what they say is, “Why should I trust you?”

Watch for next week’s blog, where we’ll discuss Jesus’ solution to this common dilemma. 

Have you ever felt like an orphan? Share this blog and your response on Twitter. Please include my username, @revgregbrewer. 

(This post is an adaption of Bishop Brewer’s sermon on May 17, 2020, in the chapel of the Diocese of Central Florida in Orlando.) 

Unless otherwise noted, Scripture quotations are from the New Revised Standard Version Bible, copyright © 1989 the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.